Ah neighbours. You can’t get away from having them unless you live on a massive property and only see them in passing as you drive past their massive property. But for the rest of us mere mortals we have to live with the mixed bag that is our neighbours. I’ve lived in my fair share of houses and apartments and I’ve noticed that neighbours can be broken up into five groups:
1. The loud neighbours
These are the neighbours that play music loudly at 11pm when you’re trying to get to sleep, fight so loudly you feel like they are standing outside your bedroom, or have really loud sex (usually after the really loud fight) making you feel like an unwilling and really uncomfortable participant in their bedroom antics. Another version of the loud neighbour is the neighbour with the loud dogs. Just as annoying really.
2. The I-have-no-idea-what-your-name-is-but-you’re-really-nice-and-remember-my-name neighbours
We all have a neighbour we have no idea what their names are (right? Tell me I’m not alone in this!). They are super nice and will say hi to you when you are both out the front of your houses, or as you pass each other walking your (non-loud) dogs, but you cannot for the life of you remember their name! The worst part is that this type of neighbour usually will know your name which makes you feel doubly guilty that you can’t remember theirs!
3. The I-would-ask-you-for-a-favour neighbours
These are the kind of neighbours that are great. They’re nice, you know their names, and you have general chit-chat over the fence every now and then. These are the kind of neighbour you can ask to feed your dog if you’re away for the weekend or collect your mail when you go on holidays. Great, dependable neighbours. I love this kind.
4. The you-kind-of-creep-me-out-and-I-don’t-want-to-be-in-a-hallway-alone-with-you neighbours
Most often found in apartment buildings when you have to take long, awkward elevator rides with strangers, or end up passing a surly looking man in a hallway with lights that need replacing as you go to enter your apartment where you live on your own. Always more prevalent at night or if you’ve had a particularly crappy day. The same neighbour can also be a benign presence on a normal day when you aren’t being so paranoid.
5. The we’re-best-friends-and-have-street-parties-all-the-time neighbours
These mythical creatures are often spoken of but I have never seen one in real life. I believe friends when they say they have these neighbours, truly I do. I just personally have never seen one. Kind of like the Loch Ness Monster or Bigfoot. You saw it? Good for you, I totally believe you. Just remember: photos or it didn’t happen!
What kind of neighbours do you have?